It’s been a while.
I remember I started this blog because of someone, for someone. All that’s changed now but my mind is still in the same place.
Someone’s got a boyfriend, been with him the entire time I’ve known her. Things have developed and I know there’s something there, she’s practically said it… I just can’t help but think she won’t finish with him. As well as this, I don’t want to be the reason they break up, it’s not cool. Whilst I think this, I don’t want things to change with her as we get along so well,
I got the job in the city. Durham uni, Canary Wharf, £25k, paid accomodation, no uni fees.
WAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUTHA FUCKERRRS
I’ve just realised how close I am to the end of my ‘NSB era’
Playing in the ‘Captains match’ today has catalysed this realisation. My last ever school rugby game, with the many people who have pulled me through it (despite the fact I’m not half the player most of them are) actually makes me feel quite sad. The freezing saturday mornings playing against kids much bigger than I…gone. The enjoyment celebrating with them all following a great performance, also gone.
When people used to say to me “school is the best days of your life” I scoured at them, as most naive 14/15 year olds would, longing for the freedom that adulthood promises however, now I’m approaching this point, I realise that I’ve been free for all of these years, developing into what I am today.
Anyone that laughs or disagrees with this is simply wrong.
wow, never thought that I’d get to this stage however, it’s the big one, the big dog, final interview for my KPMG application.
I’ve got to do a whole presentation on a business story, then be grilled on it.
Whilst I’m excited, it has caused a realisation that the possibility of the next 6 years of my life are going to be fully planned out for me. 24 years old, shit that’s scary! Obviously, it won’t all be work, but it’s a daunting thought nonetheless.
maybe she could help me out
sometimes I wonder about myself
okay so this is the latest;
I’ve been hanging out with this really cool girl quite a lot recently, we’ve been friends shortly after she joined my 6th form.
Minor detail, she has a long-term boyfriend.
I don’t know what it is though, just something about her makes me feel limitless, might sound a bit gay but I feel completely myself in all the spontaneous glory. Most girls hinder this, she loves it.
If I wasn’t such an idiot I’d just tell her how I feel, but I’m really not that kind of guy- despite the fact I’m telling all of you.
‘A problem shared is a problem halved’ so this is what I use this for.
Now the problem’s halved, maybe it will become a little easier.
